Clash of the Titans

By Zeus’s beard, this was a bad movie! Clash of the Titans really just a series of action scenes strung together with really weak prepositions. And the action scenes really aren’t that good. They’re blurry and unclear and I couldn’t wait for them to finish (apart from the Medusa scene which I actually enjoyed a lot). However the dull story and numb characters ensured that the scenes in between the action were incredibly boring.

This movie reaches an extra level of cheese when the troupe of “colourful” soldiers sets out on the quest. I knew what I was getting into when two hunters declared boldly that they wanted to come along saying “Hey why not bring us? We can provide comic relief along the way!” An older solider also attempted to throw some laughs to the audience. I guess they deserve credit for at least making me recognize they they were supposed to be jokes.

They also try to make the troupe more “diverse” (and as a result even cheesier) by adding some bad-looking Djinn creature and a woman, Io. Io’s character bothered me in particular since her only purpose was to explain the mythology things and they have her tag along on the journey purely for that reason.

The one and only thing that was really good in this movie was the art direction, which was spectacular. The coastal cities looked outstanding as did most of the sets, like Medusa’s lair, Charon’s boat, and many others. These production values could work towards a truly epic movie, however the characters, story and dialogue ensure that this comes no where close to epic.
Being a special effects film, the effects weren’t even that good. I could easily tell that the soldiers and the scorpions were being filmed separately. It did not mesh at all. And being a big Greek myth fan, and a fan of Perseus in particular, I could also rant about the liberties they took in the story, but I wont bother.  Oh, and I didn’t even get around to mentioning Ralph Fienne’s ridiculous raspy voice.
4/10

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